When I was twelve and thirteen and fourteen and still living in town, we used to take jogging trips as a family. I hacked and coughed my way along, barely picking up my feet, slogging out a twelve minute mile that barely topped the walking pace of an average adult male.
Sickened by own weakness and driven by a consistently and predictably low adolescent body image, I’d occassionally attempt to kick-start an exervise routine that I thought the writers at Seventeen magazine would appreciate.
I’d pull on the basketball shoes we were still buying form the kids section, turn the speed knob at the top of the tread mill, and lock eyes with the digits blinking back at me.
Zero point one. Wait.
Zero point two. Wait.
Zero point three.
Two point seven.
(Or as I read it, point six three away from one third of the way there.)
I leaned hard on my stubborn ability to keep my head down and not quit.
When I got on the treadmill, I never got off before that screen blinked One Point Zero back at me.
For awhile now, that’s how Rosiechild has felt.
My pride and joy in the project has grown primarily from the fact that I’m doing it.
That I’m getting through it.
That I'm not quitting.
“I post everyday! I’m so cool, I’m a real writer. Not everybody, you know, is as committed as me. Not everyobdy has the strenth and the courage and the will power to put something out into the world every single day.”
I clung to this standard of excellence and this identity as a writer, even though my “daily” posts were regularly interrupted by one or two or seven days of silence.
And worse yet, the content was second to the process.
Daily was more important than honest or funny or interesting or helpful.
Which is why I’m starting a new process next week, one that’s designed to put the focus on the content.
Starting next week, I’ll be posting here three times a week, Monday-Wednesday-Friday.
I want to include more drawings with the stories.
I want to let rough drafts sit in the sun and cure a little bit before I post them.
I want to check for typos.
I want to experiment more with podcasting and spoken word stories.
I want to take time and ask myself, “Is this a story worth telling? What’s the central conflict? Is it funny? It it vulnerable? Does it make a contribution?”
Basically, I want the content to get better, and a daily schedule pushes me back to the tread mill, eyes locked, pounding out a mile just so I can say that I didn’t quit.
The first post of the new format will arrive Monday at 8:00 am.
This weekend, I’ll focus and push myself to do more than just not quit, I'll push myself to create something that I think you guys will enjoy, something that will make a difference.
See you Monday :)